Remus' Desire
by leperksofbeingaloser
Summary: Au where The Marauders aren't a thing, but Sirius has a lot of friends, and Remus has a really big crush on Sirius. And plans to kiss him one day. Or maybe vice versa. (includes Lily E., James P., mentions and includes of Frank/Alice, and a mention of Severus S., & Peter P.)


_**Au where The Marauders aren't a thing, but Sirius has a lot of friends, and Remus has a really big crush on Sirius. And plans to kiss him one day. Or maybe vice versa.**_

* * *

Remus Lupin had a serious problem. He was in love with Sirius Black and wasn't able to do anything about it, especially since James Potter and all of Sirius' other friends are always attached at the hip and never leave Sirius alone.

It's not as if he could control his feelings, it's just that Sirius Black is so _Gorgeous_ and god when he _smiles_ , he's just so _beautiful._ And Merlin may help Remus if he ever wished to date this boy.

Especially since Sirius' sexual preferences is unknown to Remus. But he still has a small shrivel of _hope_ that Sirius will be his one day.

It's not as if Remus doesn't have friends, he does, Lily Evans to be exact. Not only does she actually _like_ Remus as a friend, but she doesn't mind the fact that every time James Potter hits on her (Sirius is always with him), Remus drools over Sirius.

In fact she quite likes teasing him about it.

Which is why every time James hits on her, she just smirks in Remus' direction and keeps pretending to play James' game, just so she can watch Remus' reaction to Sirius.

It's quite entertaining really, how he furrows his eyebrows when Sirius laughs, or how he blushes every time Sirius acknowledges his presence with a mere "hello", or how he smiles secretly every time Sirius glances at him when James flirts with Lily.

And it's not as if Sirius ignores Remus, no he's actually quite friendly, which is why Remus is always sexually frustrated, because not only does Sirius get paired up with him occasionally in potions (because of Remus' abundance of brains, and Sirius' lack of ones). But also because when James hits on Lily, Sirius starts to talk to Remus, since they both know this'll take a while. And whenever they pass each other in the halls, Sirius nods his head in Remus' direction, so only the two of them notice.

Which turns Remus' knees into jelly, but who cares right?

And they also happen to share a bedroom, but it's not as if the other one sticks around to have a small chat, one or the other is almost never in the room, except to sleep of course, but other than that, Remus always seems to have left the room before Sirius awoke, and has gone to bed before Sirius even entered the room, or sometimes when Remus and Lily stay up too late in the common room to finish homework, Sirius is already asleep when Remus enters.

"Hey Remus" Lily said as she sat beside Remus on the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall. But Remus merely gave her a brief nod as he turned back to his copy of "Hogwarts: A History" for Professor Binns' class.

"I thought you already read that chapter" she said after she had glanced at what chapter he was in apparently, chapter 27: The Dormitories.

"I had," Remus said as he shuts his book in frustration, "but I overheard James and Sirius discussing what it'd be like to 'see what the girls' dormitories seemed like before I feel asleep and wanted to double check that there was absolutely no spell for them to sneak up on you guys like that" he finished his rant by biting his toast in spite of his anger.

"Awhh Remus" Lily said in a coo-ed voice, "I don't know if I should say thank you, or ask you if your jealous about Sirius climbing up to the girls' dormitories" she gave a small laugh

"Shut up" Squeaked Remus as he frowned at his pumpkin juice.

"So, anyways, I was wondering if you'd like to accompany me to Hogsmeade this Saturday" Lily said as she changed the topic.

"I can't" Remus said, but as soon as the words were out of his mouth, he felt Lily pout beside him and start ranting about how 'they never hang out anymore, and that there's a cute fifth year boy who started working there during the weekends, and how her parents finally signed the permission slip for her after she kept pestering them for her, and how muggles don't understand anything'

"No seriously, Lil, I really can't" He interrupted her rambling with a quick shove of his history book into his book bag,

"Oh" she said, as she let his answer settle and asked, "Is Saturday your time of month again?"

Remus sighed and knew there was no possible way for him to lie his way out of the question, and nodded warily, looking down at his lap, and played with the hem of his robes.

Lily only nodded, and returned back to her jam and toast, and glanced occasionally at Remus, only to find him starting off far ahead beyond the Entrance hall to Sirius Black laughing with his many friends. And occasionally he would give a low grunt every time Sirius bursts out into complete laughter, because Remus can't help but just be sexually frustrated to know that he'll never end up with Sirius. Or that he'll ever get a chance with Sirius.

Because things like that don't _just_ happen to Remus, nothing ever _just_ happens to Remus, okay maybe that one time with the werewolf, but that was before Remus learned how to be aware of his surroundings.

His friendship with Lily didn't _just_ happen, it took quite some time for Lily and him to become friends in first year, especially after she found out his uhm… _secret…,_ but they did become official friends when she found out about his little crush that's been going on for about a year or two now.

So now, as Remus watches as Sirius and his friends enter the Great Hall, with his partner-in-crime, James Potter, heading in the direction of Lily sitting beside him.

"C'mon, Lil, I'll walk you to your first class" Remus whispered to her, as he got his bag's strap on his shoulder, and got up from the table,

"But class doesn't start for another twenty minutes" Lily answered as she stuffed her face with the last spoon full of her cereal.

"Yeah, but look who's coming this way" He looked down at her sitting figure and gave a brief head jerk towards the entrance hall as Sirius and James kept coming closer and closer in their direction.

"But I promised Severus to help him study for Charms in the library" Lily answered as she too placed her bag on her shoulder.

"Well then, I'll walk you to the library" he said as he grabbed her by the wrist as soon as she had gotten up,

But it was too late,

The duo already arrived in front of them.

"Hey Evans" James potter said, Lily cringed her nose in aggravation, but her expression quickly changed as she seen the swooned expression Remus made when Sirius acknowledged Remus' presence with a head nod.

"I was just wondering if you wanted to come to Hogsmead with Sirius and I next Saturday" he sent a flirty wink,

"I'd rather get expelled than hang out with the likes of the two of you" Lily retorted,

"Oh c'mon Evans, Remus could come too" but it wasn't James who said that, it was Sirius,

And boy oh boy the way he said _Remus'_ name, made the boy's knees give out from underneath him and made Lily come by his side and support him up

"I... C-can't-t..." Remus said, blushing furiously

"Why did you already make plans with someone else?" Sirius asked, smirking in Remus' direction

"Unfortunately" Remus said, as his converse became suddenly really interesting

Sirius' smirking expression turned into a sudden shift in his eyes as he too became fascinated by Remus' muggle shoes

Soon, Lily cleared her throat which caused all three boys to shift their attention to her instead of Remus' muggled shoes "why don't the two of you just go with one of your fangirls"

And with that, Lily and Remus turned their heads and walked away, but as they did, Lily overheard Sirius whisper to James about how he couldn't believe Remus already had plans with someone else.

 _Seems like someone is jealous,_ she internally smirked.

Remus and Lily walked into a comfortable silence towards the library, and as they arrived, Remus bid her a goodbye with an "I'll see you in class" and left quickly after that to go back to the Gryffindor common room.

But as Remus made his slow journey back to his safe haven, he bumped into Professor Dumbledore, who asked if he'd taken his potion for the past week, and reminded him to take it before he went to bed for the next two nights before Saturday arrived to lessen the pain of his fury little problem.

"Yes of course I had Professor, and I will" Remus said as Professor Dumbledore let him off with a pat on the back and a "visit madam Pomfrey in case anything goes wrong"

As Remus made his way around the many hallways and staircases, he can't help but wonder what it would feel like to kiss a certain Sirius, would their lips move in sync as described in many of the muggle fictional books he had read? Or would he just stand in an awkward position not knowing what to do? Would Sirius know what to do? Would their noses bump into each other's? What _would_ happen if they _did_ kiss?

And as Remus kept questioning the many "would's" and "what-ifs", he failed to notice Sirius pass by him as he always does every day.

Of course Remus realizes all the other days, just not particularly _this_ one as Sirius stares at him with furrowed eyebrows, while biting his bottom lip, which in all honesty drives Remus crazy.

But then again, everything Sirius does drives Remus crazy.

 _Tomorrow, yes tomorrow is when I'll decide to feel what it'll be like to kiss Sirius,_ Remus thought as he raised his head to great the Fat Lady,

"Morning Remus" said the Fat Lady,

"Morning madam," he responded then muttered the password which was 'pumpkin nipples' (they had let a muggle first year chose the password this semester, which made no sense whatsoever to anyone, _okay maybe it made sense to the muggle first years,_ but who knows).

So as Remus entered the common room, he went up the stairs to where the Gryffindor fourth years sleep, and went over to his four poster bed on the far right side closest to the door,

"Hey Remus," greeted Peter Pettigrew,

"Hey Pete" Remus greeted his sort of friend back,

"Do you happen to know if Sirius and James have gone down to breakfast?" Peter asked,

As Remus exchanged his history book for his potions and charms textbooks, he nodded in the direction of Peter.

"Okay cool, thanks mate" said Peter as he made his way out the door,

"No problem" replied Remus, as he laid back on his bed, trying to get a last minute attempt at sleep, and shielded his eyes by placing his left forearm to hide the light.

And Remus, being Remus, failed to notice a certain Sirius enter the room and shuffle through his messy bed for his Defense Against the Dark Arts notebook and Charms textbook, but when he heard lots more shuffling coming from the bed nearest him (James'), and grunts in agony and despair.

Thus he raised his arm a bit to take a peak and noticed Sirius' back towards him and a certain arse peak as he is _leaning_ to search for his said books, and Remus, as a matter of fact, has a great view of what he likes to call _a safe haven to stare at_ , and to which his dirty mind decided to make his vocal chords let out a small and _hopefully quiet_ moan.

And to Remus' despair, it seems as if Sirius heard him, but thankfully, Sirius made no comment about it and rather asked "have you seen my charms textbook? I can't seem to find it" _without_ turning around

"Uhm... I think you lent it to James the other night in the common room, so you should... Uhhh... Check there" Remus said without moving his glued eyes from Sirius' arse, he did briefly when Sirius turned back to look at him momentarily, before he stopped shuffling the clothes and the bed mess and such,

"No it's not there, I already asked Peter to help me look for it before he told me to check up here" Sirius said in despair, as he sat down on James' bed, "and James can't find his either",

All Remus' logical side wanted to do at the moment was to shrug and go back to sleep, even for just the briefest moment, _but_ Remus' crush-on-Sirius side decided to instead, sit up on his bed, face Sirius who was about two feet away from touching Remus' own feet, and say "well, I mean.. I uh.. Could lend you my book, for the ..uh.. Day, and I can just share with Lily",

And he spoke all that, _without_ catching Sirius' confused and very searching eyes,

" _Or_ maybe, we can share your book, and have Evans share with James" Sirius said as he made the hand gestures between Remus and he.

"No no no no, I really wouldn't do that to Lily" Remus said in such a hurry, that he ended up looking up at Sirius' curious yet excited gaze.

"Oh c'mon, aren't you tired of James constantly hitting on _your_ friend?" Sirius said as he nudged Remus' knee with his own,

 _Not really, no_ thought Remus, but instead nodded, seeing as he knew where Sirius was going with this,

"And wouldn't you prefer it if James stopped whining and complain about Lily all the time?"

And once again, _not really no_ because that would mean no Sirius trying to make conversation with Remus instead, but he nodded again, as he looked down at his muggle shoes once more,

"So what-d'ya-say Remus?" _oh god, the way he said his name made him so glad that he was already sitting down_ , but Remus, not trusting his vocal chords, nodded once more. And with that nod, left Sirius with a bat on the back to Remus _oh god, physical contact_ , and a "I knew I can count on you", which makes Remus feel as if Sirius and James had already planned that out,

And with an exaggerated feeling, Remus hit the back of his bed with a sigh and resumed his previous position, except this time he noticed Frank Longbottom enter the bedroom,

"What's wrong, mate?" Asked Frank as he gave a brief glance towards Remus and made his way to his own four poster bed that's across from Remus',

"Have you ever liked someone so much that their mere presence makes you sexual frustrated so you just end up nodding along to whatever they ask of you?" Remus spoke out his mind in quite a sudden ,

"Yes I had, before I started going out with Alice, and I still can't seem to stop" chuckled Frank at his own statement, "but then I realized, all in good time, and your wishes will come true"

"And who stated that? Was it Godric Gryffindor? Or maybe it was Rowena Ravenclaw?" Remus asked with a teasing tone, as he sat up on his bed,

"Frank Longbottom" said Frank as he looked up at Remus and grinned, Remus too grinned back.

"C'mon, now Rem, we've got to get to class or Flitwick'll have our heads faster than you can say _wingardium leviOsa_ " thus the two friends shared a laugh, and followed each other out the door.

When they arrived at the classroom, Frank sat in front of Remus in their normal seating. Except this time, Sirius arrived before Lily had, and sat right next to Remus, where Lily usually sat.

So when Lily came into the room, with Severus right behind her, she looked towards the filled spot which she liked to call her _seat_ , she noticed a certain person sitting in it, a certain person Remus fancies sitting beside said Remus, hunched over and _reading_ a book placed between Remus and he.

When she looked towards the seat Sirius usually takes up, she noticed a _James_ , fiddling with his book bag strap, almost as if waiting for her to come and sit beside her, well, _not today Potter, not today._

Thus she made up her mind and went to sit beside Severus.

Remus who had been shielding his eyes under his notebook, smiled silently as Lily looked over at him with a gleeful hinting gaze and motioned her eyebrows towards Sirius who sat beside Remus and moved his elbow right to the point of where it was rubbing against Remus'. But the friction of their school robes blocked any sudden physical contact from occurring.

Too bad Remus was still shielding his eyes under his notebook that he didn't notice the grin Sirius shot him or Lily winking at Remus.

But as soon as Remus raised his eyes to look, Professor Flitwick had entered and said "alright children, today you shall be working together with the person sitting beside you"

 _ah dingleberries_ thought Remus. _That wasn't how my plan was supposed to happen_

"But if you don't have anyone beside you" he glanced at James, "you may choose a group to join,

 _ah bigger dingleberries, he's going to choose Sirius, ain't he,_ Remus though, as he noticed the grin James threw Sirius. But what he hadn't noticed was the fact that James, instead of joining them, joined Lily and Severus.

"Now you're assignment is to learn all of the possible counter curses in which this lesson ties in with your defense against the dark arts" Flitwick continued, "so what'll happen, is that you and your partner or partners" he glanced at Lily who was scowling, "will throw hexes at each other -nonviolent ones please- and you must be gentle if your partner hasn't gotten the hang of counter curses yet. Everyone understand?" Most heads in the class nodded "alright begin", he said as he replaced all the tables and chairs with mats and pillows, with a flick of his wand.

Both Remus and Sirius took out their wands and stood facing each other. "I'll go first alright?" Sirius asked, and Remus not trusting his thoughts, nodded as he gulped down his nervousness.

The first few hexes that Sirius threw were easy considering Remus' fast reflexes, _being a werewolf does have its perks sometimes_ , but after Sirius started to shot one right after the other it became a bit difficult, yet Remus hadn't let any of them get to him, and it seems that made Sirius a bit angry.

But that anger subsided rather quickly when he saw a ruffled James heading their way.

"What's up with you mate?" Sirius asked as he stood up from his defensing position. Remus, not sure of his position now, did so slowly.

"Evans kicked me out of the group after I tried to throw one of those "grow-hair-everywhere" hexes and say Snape looked like a werewolf" James said as he shrugged, good thing Sirius was too absorbed in James' story to notice Remus shudder. "It's not like it was a big deal or anything," James continued, "but then Evans got way over protective, and started screaming and yelling-I'm surprised you guys didn't hear anything" Remus was sure he saw Sirius blush, "so now I'm here"

Remus glanced between both boys in front of him, who exchange glances, then Sirius nodded and looked over at Remus, who at the same time, blushed. "W-w-ha...wha-a-t" he said.  
Sirius laughed a bit and smirked, "mind if James joins us?"

 _So I can get a double beating? No,_ "sure" Remus said shielding his eyes.

And so they began, first James threw one towards Remus, Remus threw one towards Sirius and Sirius threw one towards James. And the cycle continued. Until James got angry at how Remus always blocks his hits and never once was infected like the other two, so he threw him a three times powerful 'always-trip' hex when he was distracted by what Professor Flitwick was saying. Which caused Remus to, of course, trip over his feet, but instead of him falling over on the pillows piled around them, he fell on Sirius, well it was more like Sirius went to catch him instead.

"Are you alright, mate?" Sirius looked down at Remus' head, who he was holding under Remus' arms as his feet kept shuffling around.

Remus tried to answer at the same time that he had tried standing up on his own, yet both times he failed miserably. Which caused Sirius to tighten his grip around Remus' upper torso.

"What the hell was that for?" At first Sirius thought Remus was talking to him, but he was throwing a glare towards James instead.

"I'm so sorry mate," James said as he tried to approach Remus, who instead backed up against Sirius, forgetting for a second he was there. Sirius tightened his grip again.

"Un-verse it," it wasn't Remus who said it, "now" it was Sirius.

"I don't know how" James said unsettled. "I'm so sorry Remus"

Remus flinched, causing Sirius to lace his own fingers together around Remus.

"What is going on here?" Professor Flitwick came from behind James, as a group of people started surrounding themselves around the trio plus the professor.

It seemed as if Sirius felt the glare Remus threw James because he quickly butt into answer, "James had a little mishap with one of his hexes" he said as he glanced down at Remus' dancing feet.

"How powerful?" Professor Flitwick asked, glancing between Remus and James.

Remus shrugged, but James looked uneasy, "Uh… I believe level three".

Remus' glare turned so cold that it could freeze the entire ocean world three levels deep. Sirius, not knowing what he was doing, began to rub his thumbs in order to calm the boy he was holding in front of him. It did little to calm Remus' nervous, yet it did a great deal in calming his over excited feet.

"How'd you do that?" James asked, pointing towards Remus' now calmed, yet still restless feet.

Remus glanced down, at his slowly tap-dancing feet underneath him, and was as shocked as everyone else, "I…I don't really know," he looked up towards Sirius, who he noticed had already been looking down at him, and gulped nervously.

He too, unknowing what he was doing, put his hands on top of Sirius' that were holding him upright. Sirius never stopped his thumb rubbing.

"Alright Mr. Potter, since you know of this third levels hex, you must also know of its counter curse, please go right ahead," Professor Flitwick said, gesturing towards Remus' feet who decided tap dancing wasn't for them and started ballet dancing, including pointing his toes, and smiling a smile that caused an uneasy feeling running through James' stomach.

"I don't actually know one, Professor," usually, James was the cool and confident guy, by no means one to slowly fall apart in front of his professor and his friends and his crush, who are all throwing him cold glares, even Sirius.

"very well then, a month's detention for you Mr. Potter, ten points from Gryffindor as well" Professor Flitwick said while looking at James, but he then turned his head and looked down towards Remus' still dancing feet. He murmured something under his breath and with a flick of his wand, Remus' feet had stopped their movement in the classical art of 'hip-hop' as muggles enjoy doing.

Just as Sirius was about to let go of Remus, Remus' feet almost gave out from underneath him again but not before Sirius caught him, and securing his hold this time, and also making sure that Remus wasn't slacking off as he was before, so instead of Sirius's arms being around his upper torso, they were around his stomach area.

Remus could feel Sirius's hot breath tickling his ears. But as Remus tried to stand up straighter, he felt as if he was walking on hot coals with needles built around the rocks. He whimpered quietly, hoping no one heard him.

But since Sirius was right behind him, he heard, and he whispered back, "Its alright, I've got you, don't worry." But only so Remus can hear. And Remus oblivious to that fact, blushed, as in full on head to toe blush with the butterflies running around in his stomach. Sirius also tightened his grip around Remus and once again laced his own fingers together around the boy he was holding.

"Mr. Black would you please kind as to take Mr. Lupin to the Hospital Wing so Madam Pomfrey can check what kind of medical issues he may be having because of this little incident?"

"uhm, alright Professor" Sirius said as he glanced at Remus who glanced at him at the same time, in order to figure out what they were both thinking, _how?!._ "Do you think you can walk?" Sirius asked Remus as he looked down at him, and nodded his head towards where each of their book bags are located.

"I can try," Remus replied quietly, as he felt Sirius's arms around his lower torso disappear, he lost his balance – _again —_ but this time, he did fall over on the pillows, and the seething pain from the bottom of his foot returning. But as quickly as he had disappeared, Sirius returned, but with both his own and Remus' book bag.

"Bloody Merlin, Remus, can you even function without me supporting you?" Sirius joked, grinning towards Remus, who prompted himself up by his elbows. And to Sirius, looked about as Shag-able as he ever did.

 _No I cannot,_ Thought Remus, "Of course," _not._

Sirius placed each of their book bags on either of his shoulders and offered the Remus below him a hand. Remus took his hand, but regretted it as soon as he stood up, because he _once again_ fell on top of Sirius. "I'm so sorry," Remus said as he held onto Sirius' shoulders tightly.

"S'okay" Sirius responded in a gentle manner, as he subconsciously patted down the hair on the back of Remus' head with his left hand, as his other hand had automatically placed itself on the lower end of Remus' back. "Do you think you can walk?" Sirius' tone still remained gentle.

"I don't really think so, no," Remus responded.

He found it most easy to not stutter when he's not looking directly at Sirius.

"Well then, how can we…? Oh I know!" Sirius exclaimed, scaring Remus a little,

"What'd you have in mind?" Remus asked, as he fixed his gaze on Sirius' crooked tie.

"Piggy back ride!" Sirius exclaimed a little too pitchy for a fourteen year, which even caused their classmates to glance towards them.

Remus snuck a glance towards Sirius' eyes and noticed how gleaming and excited they looked. He looked down as quick as he had bothered to glance. "I'm not so sure about that" he said.

"C'mon, just get on my shoulders" Sirius said quite excitedly.

"Not to spoil your joy or anything, but you know you can just levitate me right?" Remus said as he decided to make a bold move and looked Sirius in the eyes as he said so.

He felt as if his heart had broken in two because of the look Sirius suddenly portrayed as if he was being deflated. "Oh, right, I suppose, that works too", he was about to let go of the hold he had on Remus' hips, when he felt Remus tighten his grip on his shoulders.

"Or maybe you can carry me like this" Remus whispered against Sirius' ear, which caused Sirius to almost shudder in delight. But he too tightened his grip around Remus and lifted him bridal style, from under his knees, something Remus hadn't expected, causing him to gasp.

When they reached the Hospital Wing, -thanks to Sirius who hadn't dropped Remus _not even once_ , _bless his Quidditch skills—_ Madam Pomfrey had been quick in getting Remus to a hospital bed, and shooed away Sirius from the bed Remus' was occupying.

Sirius, who had stood by watching while Madam Pomfrey gave Remus some pain potions and a sleeping potion right after, left Remus' bag on the nightstand right beside Remus and leave with a soft whispered goodbye as he left towards his next class.

When Remus woke up later on in the day, he noticed Sirius hadn't been beside him, _I don't know why I had expected that in the first place._ Madam Pomfrey had given him a rubbing Potion to heal and decrease the pain level he felt whenever he walked. And had warned him to not run, but for now, she had let him walk to dinner to get used to the Potion, and only let him leave with a "make sure you use it, before you walk to and fro every class, alright?" to which he responded with "Alright, thank you Madam Pomfrey" and off he went to find Sirius and thank him as well. Maybe in more ways than one,

 _Hey, Remus was feeling confident right now. Might as well act upon those feelings._ When Remus walked down the hallway leading towards the Great Hall, in which he knew Sirius always passed when he came down from the Dormitory, he waited. He waited for a certain shaggy haired boy to come pass, _without his friends, of course._ And when he did, Remus was quick to scurry over to him, grab him by the elbow, and drag him to the corner of the hallway, and push him up against the wall, in which he felt more confident as the clock ticked nearby.

"Hey Remus, what're you—" but Sirius was quickly cut off by a pestered Remus who put a finger to his mouth to shush him.

Remus ran his hands over the hairs in the back of Sirius' head, feeling strangely in control. "I just… wanted to… Thank you, for what you did today, of course" Remus started to lean closer towards Sirius, as he cupped Sirius' head in his hands, and started leaning his head towards Sirius' as well.

 _What happened to the plan!? The plan for tomorrow! This wasn't the plan!_

Just as Remus' lips were hovering right about Sirius', he was stopped. By Sirius. "No, Remus, please," And Remus' confidence had quickly deflated, as fast as it had blown up.

"Oh my god, I'm sorry" Remus said feeling the horror and embarrassment take over, "I hadn't meant for this to happen, I'm so sorry, Sirius" Remus said while placing a hand over his mouth, scurrying away quickly before Sirius could stop him or say anything else.

He ran towards the dormitories before anyone can stop him, and was barely able to apologize to the two first years he _almost_ pumped into. And couldn't even look at Lily when she asked him what was wrong in the Common Room. When he bumped into Frank in their dormitories, he was already crying his eyes out, and screaming out "Please leave Longbottom!" And Frank had known it was serious when Remus used his last name instead of first, because he only ever did that when he was either really angry or really depressed as he is now.

"Who did this to you?" Asked Frank quietly, but all Remus did was point in the direction of Sirius' bed, but in Frank's case, he hadn't any idea which bed he was _actually_ pointing at, whether it was Sirius or James _or maybe, both._

Remus jumped into his bed and sobbed his little heart out.

Frank, being the good friend he is, went over and closed Remus' drapes around his four poster bed. Knowing Remus would like the privacy, (even though everyone is already down in the great hall eating dinner).

* * *

When Frank went down for dinner, he went straight towards Sirius and James who were sitting around with their friends laughing hysterically, clearly having no clue to his sobbing friend's distress.

"What in the bloody hell did you guys do to Remus?" Frank asked in clear lividness from right behind them, startling away their laughter, and making them turn in their seats.

"What're you talking about, Longbottom?" it was James who had asked. Sirius remained quiet.

"You know bloody well what I'm talking about you prat," Frank spat. James remained confused, Sirius shielded his gaze.

"How the hell am I supposed to know?" James asked with a bit of anger in his tone at being accused of something he didn't know about.

"Why in the name of Merlin's beard is _Remus crying!?"_ Frank's voice rose a bit, as he fisted his hand.

Sirius' head snapped up faster than a kid who got caught by Mr. Flinch on a late night pig hunt for food.

"Why was Remus crying?" Sirius asked as he stood up, just as fast as his head snapped up.

"I asked you guys for a reason," Frank's anger subsiding a bit as he saw the concern take over Sirius' features. "He just kind of… I don't know… He just came in and started sobbing –really hard— and before I even asked he just kind of shouted at me to get out."

Before Sirius could respond, James bet him to it, "So why'd you come yelling at us for?"

"Because when I had asked who done it, he bloody pointed in your beds' direction," his voice rose as he glared at James, but when he glanced at Sirius and his worried stance, Frank's expression softened.

"So answer me again, _what did you guys do?"_ Frank's expression may look soft, but tone of his voice is the _complete opposite_ of that.

Sirius retracted at his voice, and sat back down, James though, remained glaring at Frank, and said "it was one hex, I didn't think it would make him _cry_."

"It wasn't because of that" Sirius said from his seat. James joined him, Frank remained standing as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"What was it because of?" Frank asked, both James and Sirius shrugged simultaneously, except Sirius kept his eyes hooded down as he played with his sweater's sleeve, and James just looked really confused and asked "how do you know?"

But Sirius only answered one of them, "Because he wasn't crying when I took him to the Hospital Wing", without looking anyone in the eye and picked at his chicken even though his plate was behind him, because his back was against the table.

Frank sighed, knowing the only person who'd answer him was the man himself. Too bad he was crying his little heart out.

So he decided to just go sit by Alice, his girlfriend, and Lily, at the other end of the table.

* * *

One by one, the boys returned to their dormitories, Sirius was the last. When he was sure everyone was asleep, he crept over towards Remus' closed drapes, and saw Remus huddled up into a little ball on the side of his bed, and because of the Waning Gibbous moon hitting through the window, Sirius could see the tears that caused Remus to fall asleep.

"I'm so sorry, Rem," Sirius whispered as he patted down Remus' hair, "I didn't mean it," he ran his fingers along the softest part of Remus' hair in the back, before he re-closed his drapes and went to his own bed.

For the next week and a half, Sirius had noticed the way Remus always avoided his gaze, never answered his questions, and always pretended he didn't exist. And it honestly broke Sirius, who finally understood what it felt like for Remus.

Sirius also apparently saw Remus missing from his bed the next night and the two nights after that, thinking it had to do with what happened the previous day, and worrying a great deal because it might have been _his_ fault that Remus wasn't in his classes, and _his_ fault that Remus didn't join James and he to Hogsmeade.

He even noticed Remus missing from the places around the halls where he usually waited for Sirius to come by (thinking Sirius hadn't noticed, _but he had noticed, he noticed it for the past two years_ ).

So Sirius, after two weeks, had decided to do something about it. He doesn't know what, he just knows he's going to do something about it.

He would've asked Frank Longbottom to help him out, or maybe even Lily Evans (too bad she's not talking to either James nor he), and since they were both informed of why Remus was crying, Sirius decided to not ask them at all.

It took him almost a week just to figure out a way for Remus to notice him, -a genuine smile here and there; a nod of head when passing him in the corridors; a nudge in the shoulders when passing each other in the great hall; a glance towards Remus _if he would just look in this bloody direction,_ made by Sirius— and yet nothing worked.

It took him another week to find ways to get Remus to converse with him (it's not as if they always conversed, but at least before then Remus bloody acknowledged Sirius' presence), -a pat on the shoulder in class; asking stupid questions that would normally make Remus insult you for being so bloody _stupid_ ; passing Remus notes asking about his day, and not knowing where they were going to end up until Sirius ended up seeing them under Remus' framed pictures of his parents; passing him his favorite pastry at breakfast just to hear a bloody _thank you_ , _Sirius_ \- from Remus—and nothing worked _once again._

It took him almost two weeks just to argue the pros and cons amongst himself of whether or not asking Frank and Lily would be a good idea in helping him out in his situation. And so he decided con. About everything. Even on trying to apologize to Remus, and making Remus something more than just a friend of his.

But then suddenly, when Remus had no other alternative to get into the Great Hall without passing Sirius and his friends, Sirius saw an opportunity and took it. (Well he saw it a week after he had given up and became all moody, which made James help him out, and point this out).

So out of complete and utter whim, when Remus passed by Sirius and his group of friends for breakfast a month after the incident between the two, Sirius sprung an arm out and grabbed Remus by the wrist twisting Remus' body until he was facing Sirius, and Sirius caught him, just like he had before, except this time Sirius' hands were on Remus' waist (instead of his front torso), where it felt as if they fit together perfectly, like words on pages.

And when Remus tried to squirm his way out of it, not daring to look up at Sirius' eyes, he felt the same squeeze of reassurance from Sirius on his hips as he had a month and a week ago. Thus causing him to stop squirming and loosely place his own arms on Sirius' shoulders - _almost out of instinct._

And right before Remus could ask him what this was all about, Sirius dipped his head (since he was taller by a couple inches), and leaned in, and Remus closed his eyes, and then fireworks exploded.

Because Sirius's lips were soft and warm against Remus' own, moving slowly and delicately, matching the pace Remus was making, and when Remus was about to let go to catch air, Sirius pulled him closer, ever closer into him and wrapping his arms around Remus completely, not yet feeling the need to let go of the boy he was starting to grow a crush on. And Remus too, wrapped his arms fully around Sirius' shoulders.

And when Sirius let a deep throated groan escape the back of his mouth, the two had just heard the round of applauses and cheers they were receiving. Whether they were from Sirius' group of friends, or from Lily and Frank and Alice, or even from the professors _all the way across the room_ (they were just standing by the entrance) _,_ neither boy had noticed, as they were too engrossed upon each other, and the feel of one another in their arms, and the feeling of finally _, finally_ letting their feelings show, _finally_ feeling happy that the other hadn't turned them down, _finally_ accepting who they are, _and finally_ daring to do the impossible.

And just as Remus was about to glance at all of their supporters, Sirius asked "bet you're glad I asked to borrow your Charms book, don't you?"

And Remus, for the first time in about a month and a half, grinned, the biggest one anyone had seen in a while. And Sirius too returned his grin with another kiss on the lips.

Fin.


End file.
